yest.
20/10/08.
we met up.
its bin a
loonggg tym.
since i felt.
a tinge of happiness.
i knew right b4.
i went fer it.
how it was
gg to end.
i enjoyed every single bit of it though.
every single bit.
all memories suddenly.
came alive.
every route we used to take.
every restaurant.
we left sweet memories in.
the bus we took.
the childish act.
everything.
seems animated.
i smiled in my heart.
it was relived.
again.
one last
tym..
things later on after dinner.
got
soo tensed up.
the talk, the look, the atmosphere.
drops of indisposed tears.
buckets of it?
from both unwilling individuals.
blaming fate.
and all other factors that.
resulted to this
unfateful ending.
i braved myself.
even though the soul in me.
is dead.
numb.
create jokes.
to clear the air.
make it less stressful.
i thought i could do it.
it was
jux a brave front.
tt is all.
deep inside.
no one understands.
how i wish i could wake up.
and all this misery is gone.
vanish in the air.
how i wish.
sacrifice is a big thing.
no one can judge the amt of sacrifice.
sumone should take.
today.
yz msg me.
asked if i wanted to celeb my
bdae.
w them.
i immediately rem.
i wanted to be alone.
i
msged esc i wanted to be alone.
to bring forward the celeb to sun night.
and so she agreed.
i have been dreaming.
in broad daylight.
and in my dreams.
tt on my
bdae.
i vow to start afresh.
in my dreams.
i saw myself.
in a calm and peaceful environment.
i was enjoying the breeze.
and scenic view of the sea.
fresh air.
alone.
i
havent been feeling peaceful.
in a long long while.
then, wen i was
abt to make my vow.
to start afresh.
i saw you.
you came and hold my hands.
and whisper into my soul.
...everything is going to be fine...
i promise...
my whole mood lighten up.
i could feel the nerves in me perk up.
blood pumping fast.
i was elated.
i was excited to devour all the happiness.
and to hear more...
i....
will make you mine..
i....
will take your hand..
and walk with you
tru this convoluted journey..
i....
am willing to be the one...
you trust your life with...
to be the one who go
tru sacrifices just fer you..
to lead you to the path
whr i know you will be happy...
i....
may not know if i will be a happier person..
if i could go
tru all the tests of life ahead of me...
but with your hand..
the one i hold on tightly to..
to accompany me
tru this journey..
and to accompany you
tru this same journey..
i....
i believe...
i can past
tru any obstacles...
any blocks that hinder the journey..
to our future..
our happiness...
i....
am willing...
and.
i....
want to be that man...
that special man who protects you..
and be with you through happy times ...
and your toughest time in life...
will you...
will you?
let me be that man...
because i want to be that man...
i want to be him..
badly..
......
the freshness of the air surrounding us..
the breeze...
sounds of the sea....
was perfect..
just as i was about to say...
you have always been...
and always will be that man in my life...
a storm came and wipe us all away.
devastated as i was..
i had to swallow my guts.
my feelings.
and lock it up in a tiny space left.
available in my heart.
the only space left to keep me alive.
today.
i saw the short notes.
he wrote...
1year back..
soo full of love and warmth.
i miss the old him..
who never thought of anythin else.
other than making and seeing me happy.
childishly adorable and sweet.
would melt my heart.
a zillion tyms.
i nvr get bored looking at it.
in fact.
my heart would melt.
every single tym i read it.
how sweet.
how tragic our lives are..
things have to end this way.
my almost perfect dream.
on my bdae.
smashed on the rocks.
nvr to be revived.
wads more to celebrate..
memories will remain put...
just as memories...
memories of you..
til next tym~adios!